Choose the Gender of Your Next Child
While there are many debates about how ethical it is to choose the gender of your child before they are born.
the fact remains that there are some natural methods you can use that will increase the likelihood of having a child of a specific gender.
The ethics of it are up to you and while no method is 100% accurate, there are a few things that you can try that will help you increase your chances of having either a boy or a girl.
These methods are centered around the fact that the sperm who carry Y chromosomes (which are necessary for a boy) are very different from the sperm that carry the X chromosome (which are needed for a girl).
By understanding these differences, and choosing the right methods, you are creating an environment where one type of sperm can outshine the other and reach the main destination first. Let’s take a look at what you can do.
The Right Diet
Y sperm require an environment that is alkalai in nature while X sperm needs more acid. The PH levels of your body determine how thick the cervical discharge is and whether or not the desired sperm will be able to get through successfully.
To have a girl, you need to eat a diet that is rich in calcium and magnesium. To have a boy, a diet rich in potassium and sodium is required.
The Right Time
The timing of when you have intercourse can significantly affect the gender of your child. Because the Y sperm need to reach the egg as quickly as possible, it is necessary to time intercourse to the day that you ovulate to increase your chances of having a boy. They will be able to reach the egg while it and they are still viable.
But to have a girl, you need to give the Y sperm time to die off, leaving the more durable X sperm behind. This means that you will need to time intercourse to approximately two to three days before ovulation. This gives the X sperm more than enough time to reach the egg.
The Right Position
The position you choose for intercourse can also determine the sex of your child.
Once again, we fall back to the differences between sperm. The Y sperm need to reach their destination in as little time as possible. This means that they need to be released as close to the cervix as possible, shortening the trip they must take to the egg. Positions that allow for deep penetration are ideal.
to have a girl, you need to make it more difficult for the Y sperm to reach their target on time. This means that positions, where shallow penetration is achieved, are necessary. The sperm will be deposited further away from the cervix, giving the X sperm the chance they need to reach the egg, and allowing the Y sperm to die off.
What are the different birth control options available?
Contraceptives after childbirth are a personal choice. Most women go back to using what worked for them before pregnancy. If you have never used contraceptives, find out more about them before you decide which method you would like to use.
This depends on your age, medical history and lifestyle. To date, there is no “perfect” commercial contraceptive because all birth control options contain steroids or artificial hormones in high quantities, mostly to inhibit ovulation.
A combination of oestrogen and progesterone stops ovulation, thickens the mucous plug in the cervix to stop sperm penetration and minimises the thickness of the womb lining to prevent the embedding of the fertilised egg (or ova).
Natural birth control means timing sexual intercourse before and after ovulation when the woman’s body is naturally infertile. Couple-counselling from a trained natural family planning specialist is essential. Once the couple understands her fertility cycle, this method is considered safe (see table for the different options).
What are contraceptives and how do they work?
All contraceptives are a Schedule 3 drug, which means that although they’re not habit-forming, they do need a prescription. A prescription can be repeated for up to six months.
Can your partner get his fertility back after having a vasectomy?
The reason men go for vasectomies is to make sure that their partner will not fall pregnant.
However, making the decision never to have children is an extreme one to make, and as the saying goes, you should never say never.
Luckily, the vasectomy procedure can possibly be reversed down the line. We say “possibly” because the reversal procedure does not have a 100 percent success rate.
A vasectomy is the procedure that ties off and cuts a small section out of your partner’s tubes that carry his sperm to his testicles, known as the vas deferens. This does not mean that he will no longer have any seminal fluid, just that the sperm cannot enter the fluid, and it gets reabsorbed by his body instead.
A reversal of a vasectomy is done to put things back into working order. The procedure will reconnect the vas deferens so that the sperm will enter the seminal fluid again, and egg fertilisation can occur.
How it is done
The actual reversal procedure is not as simple as this. The urologist will make a small incision through the skin of the scrotum above each testicle. The doctor will then find the site of the vasectomy, and remove the previously ‘tied off’ ends of the vas deferens.
Once this is done, the doctor will check the condition of the epididymis. The epididymis is made up of a single small tube that is rolled many times onto itself. The epididymal tube gradually enlarges and eventually leads to the vas deferens.
The condition of the epididymis can be deteriorated, because after a vasectomy, sperm that is produced and no longer able to be carried away by the vas deferens, builds up pressure in the epididymis and can cause damage to it.
If the epididymis is damaged, there is little point restoring the vas deferens, as the sperm will not be able to travel out of the testicles into the vas deferens. The more time that has passed after the vasectomy, the more pressure build up and the higher likelihood of damage.
If there is no Damage to the epididymis, then the vas deferens will be sutured together using one stitch each. Once the reversal has occurred, pregnancy is not a guarantee – it is dependent on all the elements that usually dictate whether couples are successful at conceiving.
Raising two children, one biological and one adopted.
I became so desperate to be called ” Mommy” that I considered the adoption option almost 2 years before my husband started to warm up to the idea. He’s very traditional and was worried about the way he might feel should we in the end be blessed with a biological child as well.
He had the idea that he might not be able to love the adopted child as much as his own flesh and blood. His own DNA might be more valuable to him than someone else’s. He kept saying that we are young and that we have oodles of time to “try”.
I remember the day when he came to me and told me that he is ready and that we can start exploring the option to adopt. It was a bittersweet moment, knowing that we could begin the process but at the same time also accepting the fact that we will not be able to have a biological child.
We consider ourselves blessed that we were matched so quickly when we started the process in 2011, it took a few weeks to find out that our baby girl will be born in March and that we will be parents less than 3 months after we started the adoption process.
When we received the news my husband’s reaction of joy blew me away. Only then did I fully realise again how badly he also wanted to be a parent.
A month after being matched we found out we were pregnant. Being scared of this double responsibility and knowing the age gap is going to be so small, it still didn’t change anything about the way we felt about our little girl getting ready to meet us in a month’s time.
She was our first born, our eldest child while her little sister or brother was still a little bean in my tummy. Having a few complications during our pregnancy, my darling husband stepped in and became the one who did most of the pyjama drills and looking after our little princess while her little sister was growing and developing in mommy.
October came along so quickly, where I had to leave our 7-month-old princess with granny the one morning to go to the hospital to “fetch” baby sister.
When our family and friends came to visit in the hospital a friend asked me if I feel different towards our eldest now that we have our second child too, and I was first surprised that she could ask me this.
But I do realise that people have the perception that “blood is thicker than water” but I could honestly tell her that day that there was no difference. I love both the same and differently.
When we celebrated our youngest’s 1st birthday a few months ago, my husband and I were having a discussion about how amazing it is that there are no “weird” feelings towards our kids in terms of who was born from our heart and who from our flesh.
To us, both are the same in all aspects. It’s as stressful to adopt as it is to carry a child for 9 months and I think that’s the reason why we feel that it’s one and the same bridge we cross when it comes to the path of love for our children.